When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
