..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
