reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
