PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Randomize