How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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