Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
