On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We are two peas in an std pod
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
