is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I can't turn off my feet"
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
