So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
