so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize