so that wasnt chicken after all
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
