Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
