the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
