so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Randomize
