What tipped you off? The sombrero?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize