you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
