all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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