Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
