You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
