I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize
