i just had sex bonerless
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
