Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize