How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Fuck appropriateness.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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