some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
