Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
