This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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