im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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