He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
