So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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