i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize