the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
