You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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