I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
