Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
please come you make the beer taste better
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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