YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
