Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize