you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
As shirtless as possible
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize