i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
