I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
