You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize