so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
