I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
