she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
