what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
