I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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