Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
