Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
