Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Randomize
