That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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