I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
