My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
